


alphas are tough creatures (really)

by ZeroSum404 (sensalito)



Series: Failwolf [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Failwolf - Freeform, Failwolf Friday, Fluff, Gen, Kittens, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-06
Updated: 2013-04-20
Packaged: 2017-11-28 10:29:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/673383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sensalito/pseuds/ZeroSum404
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He stares at the kitten, the kitten stares back. There's a lot of staring going on and he has no idea what to do. So he does the first thing he thinks of: he brings the kitten in and calls Stiles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea, don't look at me like that. I'm not even sure it counts as Failwolf!Derek?

Winter is a bit of a pain in the ass for Derek:

  1. because all the snow makes his senses kinda dull (next to no scent, sight less effective with the white blanket covering everything and the cold making touch numb)
  2. because 1 makes it impossible to train the betas outside and you can only do so much inside of a warehouse
  3. because without proper training, a werewolf (and especially an alpha) who cannot evacuate steam quickly grows restless



And this particular morning, Derek is way past restless into 'I-will-soon-murder-myself-if-I-can't-relax'. But well, he hasn't slept a full night for a week now and there's no need to stay in bed for longer than he has to if it's just to turn and toss. This is why he's up at 5.35 am and glaring at the tea box sitting innocently on the shelf next to the coffee.

 _For a calm and relaxed night,_ the box read.  _(Artisanal concoction of lemon balm, chamomile, skullcap, rose petals, passionflower and lavender)_

Yeah, how about no.

"I don't even want breakfast anyway." he mutters and turns back around towards the 'living room', by which he means the open area of the train station he usually stay in on weekdays: it's been closer to two full weeks now, because of the snow.

He's about to sit go sit down on the ratty couch in the middle of the 'room' when a pitiful and faint 'meow' reaches his ears. (Ah! His good old hearing, at least _it_ hasn't let him down: as sharp as ever!)

He opens the door half-naked, blizzard making his nipples tighten lightning quick and painful and letting snow in, and looks around. A black little point in the corner of his eye makes him turn his head and-

He finds himself looking at an even tinier than he thought ball of fluff, huddled close to the metal wall of the building and trying to hide under a scrap of carboard box. The ball lets out another miserable mewl and looks up at him.

He stares at the kitten, the kitten stares back. There's a lot of staring going on and he has no idea what to do. So he does the first thing he thinks of: he brings the kitten in and calls Stiles. (He's not heartless, it's freezing outside, no way was he letting the feline to die a painful death in the snow).

And he waits.

He'd fetched an old shirt and drapped it around the kitten, putting it on the coffee table while they waited to hear the familiar growl of the Jeep and hadn't moved since; they're still staring at each other warily, neither really moving except for the occasional shiver (probably due to the cold, Derek thinks) from the kitten's part where he is almost entirely buried under the fabric of Derek's shirt.

They don't wait long like that: ten minutes top before the Jeep's wheels scritch to a stop in the parking lot. Stiles himself bursts in barely two minutes later, shaking his whole body like he's trying to force the cold out and his teeth clacking a little.

"It's freezing out, Jesus! I barely was out at all and I swear I was at that to catch pneu- Derek, is that a kitten? Why is there a kitten on your coffee table?"

Derek raises his head towards him, eyes big as a saucer and hands splayed out as if to say 'I don't know! I woke up and it was there'.

"It was outside my door and mewling." Derek mutters, like this is self-explanatory.

Stiles stares at him, Derek stares back, the kitten stares between them; nobody moves for a second. The kitten mewls.

"Awwwww!" The exclamation takes both Derek and the kitten by surprise if how they startle is any indication. "You are so cute, I knew there was a reason I loved you so much!"

Derek scowls, or well attempts to but his wringing hands and slightly colored cheeks makes it a bit difficult to be taken seriously.

"Shut up." Pfft, he's not pouting. Really.

"And you've given it your favorite shirt too! Oh my God, my heart is melting I cannot right not!"

"Shut up, I didn't do it on purpose, it was just there!"

"You lying liar who lies, this shirt is always the last one in your bag because you don't want anyone to accidentally take it and, like, lose it or stain it with their blood. I know this because last time I was here and needed something to sleep, you had to dig in your travel bag for 5 minutes before you found it."

It's clear on Stiles' face he thinks he's won so Derek lets it go and changes subject instead.

"What do I do with it anyway? All it does is stare at me." he grouches, raising a hand to indicate the kitten who shivers once more and shrinks on itself.

"It's scared, you dork! Look, it's shivering so bad, it's a wonder it hasn't pissed itself yet."

Derek looks horrified for a second, looking at his shirt and probably thinking of taking it back, just in case. Stiles shakes his head.

"You're hopeless." He finally takes the final steps to the couch, gently pecking Derek's lips and plucking the kitten in his lap. "There there, you little thing, big bad wolf ain't gonna eat you I promise." Derek growls at the nickname and the kitten's hair stand up; Stiles smacks the back of his head. "Don't do that, idiot!"

Derek subsides, pouting. "Don't call me that."

"But I'm your Little Red Riding Hood, Der-Der!" Stiles says, looking up coyly through his lashes at him.

"You suck. I don't know why I like you at all, you're such an asshole."

"No swearing, there are innocent ears lying around. And I may be an A-S-S-H-O-L-E-" ("did you just really spelled asshole because of the kitten?"-"Shush you, I said no swearing!") "-but I'm yours."

Derek preens (not that anyone would dare call it that at his face but it's no less true). "Damn right."

"Derek, what did I just say?" Stiles scolds half-heartedly, small private smile breaking midway through.

Derek raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything else, choosing instead to tentatively pet the kitten which seems to have fallen asleep cuddled in the warmth of Stiles' body while they were talking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you see mistakes, you're welcome to point them out.
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated and constructive criticism is encouraged!
> 
> You can find me here: haletothealpha.tumblr.com


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two months later: winter has subsided; spring is blossoming gently, slowly. Kitten shenanigans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A comment gave me inspiration so there you go. Bonus chapter!

There is something bugging him.

Derek Hale is bothered, right now.

He's asleep and already there is something irritating him.

Not him actually but more his wolf. His wolf is pacing in his mind, restless, tugging at his consciousness because something is wrong.

Fuck. This is Saturday morning, can't he catch a damn break?

 _Apparently not_ , he thinks, eyes blinking sluggishly open. He doesn't move though, preferring to extend his hearing to see if there's actually anything dangerous lurking. He doesn't hear anything. He then looks around and that's when it hits him.

He's up in a shot, making sure not to wake up Stiles in the process 'cause they went to bed late and he needs his rest, and makes his way out of the train, looking left and right and hissing under his breath at the cold concrete beneath his feet.

There's noone up beside him and Isaac though.

"Where's Meow?" he asks gruffly at his not-completely awake beta sitting on the ratty couch, staring at the TV.

["Why the hell did you call your cat Meow?" -"It's the first thing he told me, Stiles, what else should I have called him?"]

"Whunfg?" Isaac replies, startled, hair completely askew.

"Meow. Where. Is. Meow."

"...Who?" The beta's face is a mix of 'still-asleep-talk-slowly' and 'what-the-fuck-are-you-high'.

Derek sighs: his whole pack is fucking hopeless. "My cat, idiot, where's my cat?"

"Oooh Meow. Huh..." Isaac paused, seemingly giving the question some thought. "Nesting in Erica's hair I think."

"...He's what."

"You know, Stiles' right, you totally have a problem with ponctuation." At the warning look the alpha gave him though he waved towards the part of the train Erica and Boyd were sleeping in. "I heard a thump around 4 a.m.: I think he might have fell from you guys' car and since the stairs are still broken, he wandered around to find something to get warm. So. Erica's hair."

Derek stands there for a minute, staring at Isaac. Isaac stares back. Again with the staring, he really needs to stop doing that, it's becoming a thing. Also, he really needs to fix those stairs.

He makes his way quickly to where Isaac indicated to take back Meow because if Erica finds a kitten nesting in her hair, there will be shrieking and nobody wants that: she's got a piercing voice.

When he steps in, nobody realizes, for which he might have woke them up and scold them for in a past life but right now he doesn't care because if he looks closely at the head of his betas' bed, he can see his little ball of fur and it's really nesting in Erica's hair _oh god please make Erica not notice._

Derek quickly grabs Meow, pulling him in his shirt and petting him to keep the kitten from freaking out and mewling, and then gets the hell out of there on his actual tippy toes like a cartoon character while his kitten snuggles his chest _jesus what has is life turned to._

He walks as fast as he can back to his own bed while trying to make the least noises possible even as his heart beats faster than normal due to the tiny adrenaline shot he got while rescuing Meow from the wrath of a scorned Erica. He breathes a sigh of relief once back under the covers, Meow cuddling in his neck and purring; he purrs back a little, kind of, though only because nobody can hear or see him (except perhaps Isaac but the kid's too smart to tell on Derek), and goes back to sleep.

* * *

The shriek comes at noon:

"DEREK YOUR SPAWN OF HELL MADE A MESS OF MY LOCKS: HE TOTALLY FUCKING CHEWED SOME HAIR THAT LITTLE SHIT I WILL SKIN HIM ALIVE!!!"

At least they slept a little.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you see mistakes, you're welcome to point them out.
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated and constructive criticism is encouraged!
> 
> You can find me here: haletothealpha.tumblr.com


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meow is an adventurous kitten. Derek might keel over from a heart attack soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not betaed.

Derek leaps from the couch, throwing himself towards the kitchen table arms extended and landing with a painful looking _thud_ on the hardwood floor of the loft, Meow dropping softly on the back of his head a second later.

"Derek? You okay?"

"Hnnng."

Stiles slaps a hand on his mouth to stop himself from laughing, while Meow simply starts to groom Derek's hair like nothing happened. Derek 'hnng' again but doesn't move from his sprawl, entire body relaxing now that the threat passed.

"He's a kitten you know. Felines tend to land on their paws."

"Hissonytin."

"What was that?"

Derek raises his head a little, making sure not to disturb the kitten perched on it too much. "I said 'he is only tiny'."

Stiles stares. Derek stares back. Meow starts licking his bangs, flattening them on his forehead. Finally Derek cracks, starting to pout as Meow descends a bit more to start on his eyebrows.

"Look at him, his tongue is barely broad enough for one of my eyebrow, this is ridiculous."

"He's only lucky you haven't put gel on this morning, poor cat."

Derek looks horrified. "I wouldn't let him lick that stuff, he could get sick."

"So what, you realized he liked to lick you and you're never gonna use gel again and you're going to jump and leap and climb your walls and pad everything to make sure he doesn't ever gets hurt?"

Derek shrugs, like that's no big deal. One of Meow's paw lands in his eyes as the kitten reach over to get to the second eyebrow; Derek doesn't even twitch.

"Oh my God, I have never seen someone so fucking whipped and it's not even your significant other. Actually, I feel kind of wounded."

Derek raises an eyebrow, lowering it again quickly as the kitten follows the movement to finish his grooming. "You feel wounded that I take care of my cat?"

"I feel wounded because even I don't hold that much power over you and I'm the one giving you orgasms on a regular basis and who slaves for you at the stove to make you dinner!"

"I don't think heating up a hot pocket is considered slaving at the stove."

"Shut up, this totally counts! And you're changing the subject, you're so infuriating!"

Derek shrugs, making himself comfortable on the floor while Meow does his business.

* * *

A week later, a shout makes him jump.

"STILES! DEREK IS TRYING TO CLIMB THROUGH THE WINDOW TO ESCALADE THE FACADE OF THE BUILDING! COME KNOCK SOME SENSE IN YOUR BOYFRIEND FOR FUCK'S SAKE!!!"

Stiles runs, skipping down the stairs and only managing not to fall to his death by sheer luck. "What what what??"

Derek is being held back by Boyd, Isaac, Scott and Erica and is still managing to drag himself milimeter by milimeter towards the window.

"LET ME GO GODDAMIT I WILL EAT YOUR FACES!" Derek roars.

The sight is kind of hilarious: Isaac and Scott each have a leg while Erica is perched on his back, clutching an arm, and Boyd is in front pushing at his torso. They all shrink some at the sound but don't relish their grip on him.

"What are you doing? Why do you want to climb out the window??"

Derek doesn't answer: he's wolffed out, a hand reaching out towards the window and painstakingly making his way towards it.

"His fucking kitten decided to go on a stroll on the ledge and now he's mewling for help!" Erica replies, leaning back to use her weight to slow him down.

"LET ME GO I NEED TO GET HIM!"

"What the fuck are you talking about, I took him in ten minutes ago!"

Everything stops at once as everyone turns to look at him. "What." Derek ~~asks~~ says.

"Punctuation, Derek, we talked about this oh my God." The man growls. Stiles rolls his eyes. "I said I took him in ten minutes ago, he was at the bedroom's window scratching the glass; I think the sun warmed stone of the ledge got a bit too hot for him, it's approaching noon."

"But." Derek straightens a little, nobody else moving from their position on him. "I heard mewls."

"Yes. Probably ten minutes ago and since you were making sunch a racket you didn't hear he wasn't anymore."

"Oh." He extends his ear towards the wall, listening. "Oh."

Stiles shakes his head and goes back upstairs. What does he see in this bloody idiot, seriously?

A dull  _thud_ echoes a minute later followed by an _ow!_ he's 75% sure comes from Erica but could also be from Scott.

* * *

"Hum... I think Meow is stuck in your ventilation...?" Isaac ~~says~~ asks four days later.

Stiles can almost feel the painful skip of Derek's heart at that: the man is staring wide-eyed at Isaac, book cover protesting in his hands as he tightens his grip.

"What."

Stiles needs to take him to the school one of this day, push him in a class so he'll learn punctuation with the others kids. Actually, he'll take the entire pack since it seems to be contagious. He also makes a note to look in the bestiary or possibly asks Peter if werewolves can be subject to heart failure.

They end up knocking on the neighbor's door as the man is a firefighter and more experimented in this kind of things.

"Don't worry, I do this every weekend: kittens love to explore and they're full of mischief, they always end up doing crazy stuff, especially the ones who don't have a mother to scold them when they do something bad or dangerous. He'll be like that for a few years still. I suggest you just make sure the air vent is screwed on tight in the kitchen and the bathroom too: you should be okay."

So now they have a hole in the kitchen wall but at least Meow is safe and sound. Derek cries a little in relief. Or possibly worry for the years coming; Stiles almost join him, to be honest.

Stiles makes a post-it to remind himself for the heart attacks/werewolves compatibility and sticks it on the fridge. Just in case: this could be legit useful if the guy is right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you see mistakes, you're welcome to point them out.
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated and constructive criticism is encouraged!
> 
> You can find me here: haletothealpha.tumblr.com

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments always appreciated: encourages me to pursue the delusion that I do not suck at this


End file.
